Not Exactly Shakespeare
Do you have to write a book report? Have you not read any of the required literature because life happened? No worries. I present the ultimate literary tool to help you write that book report. You don’t even have to read this novel: there is a perfectly serviceable and compulsory book report at the end. You can just copy it and get on with the important stuff.
You could read about the important stuff. 25 pages full of sex, drugs, the fate of our species in the cold, uncaring vacuum of space… but you really don’t have to. In fact, it’s probably a good idea to skip it.